Still More 11 Little Secrets

I love a good meme. This one was started by Christopher S. Penn, picked up by Olivier Blanchard and then by my friend DJ Waldow.

Here’s how Chris defined it:

We strive desperately to look for the next big thing, the next big secret, the magic wand that will make everything better. What we tend to overlook: or most of us, anyway: are the little secrets, the little hacks and tweaks you can make to your day, your year, your life to help things operate better.

So here are mine. Some of these are things I’ve learned and taken in, some are things I’ve learned and am trying to apply, and some are things I know I should be doing and don’t do very well at all.

  1. Make the hard call first. I started my career as a reporter. I’m not a very confrontational person. I would often spend an entire day “or an entire week” dreading making a call I didn’t want to make. Twenty years later I know the secret: pick up the phone and make the call and get it out of your head.
  2. Don’t assume people know what you’re talking about. I’ve been in dozens of meetings and conversations where people glossed over the simple, preliminary stuff and got right to the complex ideas, assuming that everyone else had read the agenda, the introductory email or remembered what happened in the last meeting. If it’s your idea or project, it will be very vivid to you. A lot of people in your audience might not have a clear idea of what you’re talking about and won’t stop you to ask. Restate the assumptions. Give a quick summary. Ask questions. Make sure people know what you’re talking about.
  3. Learn to speak better. About two years ago I took the Ultimate Power Speak class from Bart Queen of Speak America. “Generally I run like hell from anything that looks like a motivational speaker, but Bart really knows his stuff and teaches a really simple and practical method.” One thing we learned in the class was how often we all say things like “um” and “and” and “but” and “so.” Record yourself sometime and listen to all the superfluous junk you utter. Then listen to the really great speakers and see how seldom they do it. It will mess with your head for quite a while and make you feel self-conscious whenever you open your mouth for weeks, but in the end you will be a much more powerful communicator.
  4. Humor is possibly the most powerful communications tool. I’ve often been the guy on the communications team who wanted to do something goofy. Sometimes that’s made other people nervous. There are still a lot of people in corporate America who think we need to present ourselves as august and serious, or our customers won’t trust us. I’ve never found that to be true. It’s hard to be genuinely funny in a corporate context and nobody likes it when it’s forced. But when you can engage people with humor, they will like your message more and remember it longer. “Obviously a lot of this depends on what kind of business you’re in – I don’t think anybody wants a funny funeral home, for instance.”
  5. People usually aren’t mean or stupid. We’ve all been in situations where we were dealing with someone far away, on the other end of a phone or an email thread, and things weren’t going the way we wanted. It’s easy to get mad and assume the other person is an idiot, or has a hidden agenda or is otherwise jerking you around. I’m 44 and have been working since I was 15. I worked construction for a summer. I’ve tended bar and cooked in restaurants. I’ve been a DJ. I’ve been a consultant. I’ve worked at big companies and small. The sum total of all that experience has shown me that people are usually pretty decent and well-meaning. Things run more smoothly “and with less angst” if you assume that than if you always assume the opposite.
  6. Don’t live in your inbox. So many days I find myself picking up my iPhone as soon as the alarm goes off, waiting for my eyes to focus, and checking to see if I’ve gotten any work emails overnight “one of the particular features of working for a global company”. When I get to the office, it’s really easy to go straight to Outlook and stay there all day. Break out of that. Make time to read and learn and create and interact. You might be the kind of person – like me – who thinks the person who emailed you is sitting there drumming her fingers waiting for a response. That’s probably not happening.
  7. Don’t speed. Do the math. If you’re on your 20-mile morning commute, there is no substantial difference in what time you arrive at work if you drive 65 or 75 or 85. It’s a matter of a few minutes. Drive the speed limit. You’ll be much calmer when you arrive and you won’t have to spend your whole drive worrying about cops. Also, some of us have kids in the car, dammit.
  8. Really, nobody cares how much your watch cost. I like watches. I have a bunch. I have some that cost ten bucks and one that cost more than my first car. No one has ever commented on that one. I have one watch that always gets comments from people: co-workers, flight attendants, waiters, people in elevators. Because it has an orange strap.
  9. Save your indulgences for things that are worth it. This definitely falls into the “things I know I should be doing and don’t do very well” category. Every day we are confronted with opportunities to do things that aren’t good for us. Don’t eat the stale donut in the break room. Save the calories for something really good that you really love. Don’t sit on the couch for two hours staring at reruns of House Hunters. Go to bed, read a book or do something with your brain. Save that couch time for when you have a show or a movie you really want to see.
  10. Know how you learn. Are you a visual learner? Do you have to get your hands on something to understand it? Do you glean information from lectures? Every day we are given dozens of opportunities to learn, in dozens of different formats. I can’t learn to use a new software application or tool, for instance, by having someone explain it to me. I need to play with it. My mind tends to wander in long lectures. Now I know not to bother dialing in for that “lunch and learn,” because I’ll just end up bored and drawn into my inbox.
  11. You can only go without sleep for so long before you get sick or stupid or both. The older I get “and maybe it’s because I’m getting older”, the more I realize that I need a full night’s sleep to be of any use, and if I go for too long sitting up every night working until midnight, I will get sick. Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is go to bed.
  12. And with that, I’m off to bed. How about you? What are your little secrets?