Yesterday I saw a green pickup truck that looked like it belonged to the North Carolina forest service. It had a bumper sticker that read “Real Trees Make Scents” with a little picture of a pine tree. Is there an aggressive, in-your-face marketing campaign for pine trees? And not to get all Andy Rooney again, but am I paying for it? What is the issue here? Did some bureaucrat in Raleigh decide that our state tree’s Q rating was too low?
“This month’s numbers are in. We’re getting our asses kicked by oaks and maples, and don’t even get me started on the frigging beeches. We’ve got to do something or we’re all going to be begging for jobs with the Cattleman’s Association. With that in mind, I’ve brought somebody new on board. She’s from California, and I’m sure you’re all familiar with the work she did for the redwoods”
When I worked for Big Telecommunications Company Who Sucks and Laid Me Off, I went into the cafeteria one day and saw a poster proclaiming September National Rice Month. This was too much to resist, and inspired by Don Novello’s Lazlo Toth letters, I wrote to the USA Rice Federation. “You may remember their breakthrough campaign, “It’s Not Just for Commies Anymore””
Hello!
I just saw a very handsome poster in our company cafeteria advertising “National Rice Month” First of all, congratulations on getting your own month! Well done! I love rice and eat it at almost every meal “even breakfast – I love Rice Krispies!”. What would it take for me to get a copy? “The poster says “September: National Rice Month and has a very nice image of rice waving majestically in the field, or paddy, I guess. [I don’t know as much about rice production as I should!] It would look great in my kitchen! I’d be sure to tell my guests where I got it, and to eat more rice!” If it’s possible to get one “or even two – I have a friend who loves rice almost as much as I do!”, I sure would appreciate it “and I’d eat even more rice!”.
They fell for it. I suppose I should put the poster up. But I’m saddened to report that www.nationalricemonth.com is no longer there: no doubt another tragic casualty of the economic downturn.
Addendum: The “Real Trees Make Scents campaign is apparently the work of AgriBusiness Communications Group, right here in the Greater Chapel Hill-Carrboro metroplex. They’re the folks who also brought us “Catch the Sweet Potato Wave” “Someone needs to tell them that no amount of fancy photography can make a sweet potato look pretty.”
I wonder if they’re hiring.